The secret to finding an ideal mate is to get out of the house and begin networking as much as possible. Every person you come in contact with is a possible connection to your ideal mate. An estimated 87% of all marriages result from introductions made by other people. Your life will be enriched while meeting new people and doing new things. Just because the person you first meet isn’t your "type" don’t forget they have friends, co-workers and relatives that might prove to be a connection to your ideal mate. See our Relationship Deal Breakers.
As you meet new people please don’t mislead anyone by letting them think you are interested in them on a romantic basis if you are only interested in a friendship. Be open and honest right from the beginning by letting them know you want a friendship. This could save you both embarrassment and hurt feelings later on.
Here are some suggestions of places to go and things to do to find your ideal mate. We also suggest that you read the article: "A Singles Guide to the Newspaper". It will help you find activities that suit your personal interests. Remember to go where the people go! The best suggestion is at the end of the list so we invite you to read on.
- seminars and/or lectures
- adult education classes
- college courses
- complementary classes at stores
- Join organizations both professional and social
- Church related events or organizations such as Crossroads
- Parents without Partners
- Your children’s events:
- PTA, chaperone outings, day care, recitals, plays and concerts
- Start a new hobby and find other interested people.
- Form your own support groups or join a support group
- Take up race walking
- Do charity races for walkers and runners - You get to be with hundreds of singles at these events and help a good cause at the same time
- work and friends - let friends make introductions for you
- Take group tours while on vacation
- Try new things. Get out of the house! Keep changing and growing for the better and you will become more attractive & interesting to others.
- Go to parties or any social gatherings. If you are an introvert or shy, read a book on mingling and practice to become more comfortable with mingling & networking.
- book signings
- book stores
- coffee shops
- softball games
- civic events
- political service
- craft shows
- roller skate, ice skate or roller blade
- join a gym
- aerobics classes
- Martial arts classes
- any sports events or activities
- concerts, plays, or shows of any sort
- zoo (look for real people not animals)
- celebrations of any kind (weddings, parties etc.)
- art galleries & museums
- bowling or bowling leagues
- tennis courts, bike trails etc.
- Laundromats and/or grocery stores
- ask your friends and acquaintances
- Run ads or answer ads in the singles section
- Check out Internet Dating Sites
- Keep your options open and don’t judge a book by its cover. Look beyond a person’s shell.
- Make your list describing the qualities you want in an ideal mate. Be very specific and detailed. Read your list often and revise it if necessary. Be an active choosier rather than a passive object waiting to be picked.
- Volunteer anywhere. We highly recommend that you do volunteer work. Call the United Way volunteer center in your area. Tell them what you are interested in doing and they will match you up with organizations who need your help. You are under no obligation so keep trying volunteer work until you find the one that is right for you. The beauty of this approach is that you will be contributing to society and yourself while you are meeting new people who share your principles, values, and interests. Now, isn't that a better way to find someone with common interests than going to the bar? This is an exceptional method for shy and introverted people.
Keep working on your self-love and self-esteem. The more confident and self-accepting you become, the easier it is to attract your ideal mate.
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