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How well you and your partner
listen is critical to effective
communication
.
Effective communication is the life-blood of all good relationships.
This listening skills rating is a self-evaluation of the current level
of your listening skills as well as what you perceive your partner’s listening skills
to be. Please complete the form at this time and, if your partner is working along with
you, he/she should do so as well. Take the evaluations separately, review the scoring
which follows on a page indicated at the bottom, and then get together to discuss the
results. We suggest that you print the evaluations and complete them on paper so you will
have print copies to compare. Be sure to keep an open mind so you may learn and
grow.
Click Here for the New Fully
Automated Online Self-Evaluation
You may
use the automated online version or the following manual version. The
multiple-choice automated version includes a discussion of the answers.
INSTRUCTIONS:
Think about how often you do the following and write in
the number that you think matches that frequency?
On a scale from 1 to 5, give yourself a score as follows: 1 = never, 2
= rarely, 3 = sometimes, 4 = often, 5 = very often.
| behavior |
score |
| I avoid staying on any one subject with my partner |
|
| I make assumptions about my partners feelings or thoughts. |
|
| I respond to my partner’s suggestions or opinions with, "Yes,
but…" |
|
| I bring up past issues during current disagreements. |
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| I interrupt my partner’s conversation. |
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| I use sarcasm or jokes to respond when my partner talks |
|
| I respond to a complaint with a complaint. |
|
| I insult and criticize my partner. |
|
| I respond to my partner with phrases like, "That’s
ridiculous." |
|
| I see only my point of view. |
|
| TOTAL (Add up your scores.) |
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Now You
rate your partner’s listening
skills: How often do they do the following? On a scale from 1 to 5, give
them a score as follows: 1 = never, 2 = rarely, 3 = sometimes, 4 = often, 5 = very often.
| behavior |
score |
| My partner avoids staying on a subject until it is solved |
|
| My partner make assumptions about my feelings or thoughts. |
|
| My partner comments with, "Yes, but…" to my suggestions or
opinions. |
|
| My partner brings up past issues during current disagreements. |
|
| My partner interrupts my conversation. |
|
| My partner use sarcasm or jokes to respond when I talk. |
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| My partner responds to my complaints with a complaint. |
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| My partner insults and criticizes me |
|
| My partner responds to me with phrases like, "That’s
ridiculous." |
|
| My partner see only their point of view. |
|
| TOTAL (Add up your scores for your partner.) |
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Discussion:
Make a note of the total scores for yourself and your partner
and go to ratings discussion and Listening Advice.
This "Listening Skills Rating" is taken from the book
"Talk to Me: How to Create Positive,
Loving Communication."
You will find many helpful
tips on how to enhance your listening skills in the book.
Check out the article on
How to
become a better Listener
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