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Safe Networking
and the 3 minute Conversation Guideline

Singles are meeting by the millions through internet dating sites and other singles events.  It is important that safety be used especially with internet dating.

First meeting tips:

  • Go in separate cars.
  • Meet at a coffee shop or someplace else that is also inexpensive and public.
  • Meet during the morning or afternoon for first time meetings if possible.
  • Pay your own way.  It keeps obligation out of the picture.
  • Don't give out your phone number or address until you're very comfortable with the person.
  • Plan to keep first meetings to no more than 30 -45 minutes. If you are getting along arrange another meeting.

Internet connections:

Be very cautious and skeptical about people you "meet" on the Internet.  Who they appear to be may very well be a work of fiction.  At the very least,
the image that you receive via your modem and screen will be different from physical reality.

Read Rating the Internet Dating Sites

Check people out carefully before you agree to meet and then use all of the common sense precautions.  Even if you date a few times you will still want to verify
that they are truly who they say they are.

Don't give away intimate or financial information to people you haven't met.

Sex - Should you wait?

We suggest that you wait for sex.  Honor your principles, values, and religious beliefs.  Sex has a powerful way of creating feelings, obligations, and ties that sometimes
override common sense.

If you do choose to be physically intimate, practice safe sex.

Singles looking to date or for love on internet dating sites should remember the difference between dating, romance and marriage.  Marriage is a commitment while dating and romance should be more about fun and personal discovery.  Build your loving relationships on a foundation of truth and understanding. 

The 3-minute Conversation Guideline:

People begin to judge you in the first moments of meeting.  Conversation involves listening.  People will feel better about you if you listen to what they have to say and carry on a good conversation.

Good networking involves the 3-minute conversation guideline. Share the conversation. Don't talk too long. Wise networking is to talk for about 3 (three) minutes and then give the other person a chance to talk. Ask them open-ended questions to give them an opportunity to carry their side of the conversation. If you are with an introvert or shy person continue to ask open-ended questions to encourage them to talk for a while. Don't try to fill the silence with more talking on your end. Show interest in the person you are with. Some examples of open-ended questions are "Tell me about some of your interests and hobbies?"

If they say they like to read for example ask, "What book are you reading now? What is it about? What is your favorite book and why?"

Another good networking guideline is to not take over the story of the person whose turn it is to talk. For example, if the person talking says they went to Paris last year and you've been to Paris also, don't jump in with that information. Allow the person to talk about their Paris experience and to share their story first. Ask them questions about their trip and adventure. Then when it is your turn to talk you can share your Paris story.

If you want some mingling tips read our article on How to Mingle  and The Importance of Small Talk

Test your listening skills.


 

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